One shot. Two shots.
I really should take it easy on the vodka as I can’t afford to Uber home. I open my eyelined, false lashes framed Grey contacts colored eyes and scan the smoke-filled, dimly lit club for a ride home and within seconds my already blurry eyes rest on a fine brother seated 5 persons from me… He’s not bad, looks like a Honda Accord with a #250,000 per month job but sadly his 7 months old pot belly isn’t something I look forward to seeing bare tonight, at least not tonight. Tonight I deserve someone nice really nice, like a glass of white wine.
Several feet from me the reflection of the club’s flickering lights on a shiny forehead catches my attention. Hmm…. Well hello! mr. Beard gang with a receding hairline, looking like a Porsche car and a 1.5 million naira per month job. I get up from my stool at the bar, comb my fingers through my blonde shoulder-length wig, tug at my few-inches-below-my knees black body con dress and walked towards Mr. Beard gang. The closer I got the more attractive he became, I mean he’s the complete package; 6packs, beard gang, nice style, and he’s scent… Oh goodness he smells like dollars!
A smile, little chit-chat, couple of drinks, prolonged skin contact here and there and I’m in his hotel room. We make out a little and I feel like puking, so I’m in the bathroom puking my guts out when I catch a glimpse of my reflection in the mirror directly above the sink. Suddenly I’m sober… Sigh. It’s 2am on my 21st birthday and I’m wasted in a stranger’s hotel room. What a life!
Bloody Mary: The series is authored by The Fifteenth